Saturday, August 16, 2008

The Standstill.

I haven't blogged for so long; but all these emotions are bottled up inside but blogging has shown me that it is so difficult to express all that is going on. Firstly, I feel so lonely. In the last week, I feel like I've lost a good friend, while gaining another sort of relationship. I've wanted this relationship to move into that stage for so long, but now that it has happened, I'm missing what I had.

Isn't it so cliche?

You don't realize what you have until you lose it and it's too late.

I've been feeling off all week: blaming it on being too busy, running from work and school and squeezing homework and life in between. My mind didn't let me feel. But when I did realize what was wrong, it completely made sense. I'm the one that feels distressed when I don't talk to that friend for a day. And now, after not having that friend in my life for a week-- I'm an emotional train wreck.

I apologize for the sadness, but this blog can't do justice for how sad I really feel.

On the other hand, while the rest of the world is gaining golds and silvers at the Olympics, India is on its own mission: Making the LONGEST Pizza

P.S. I'm hooked on the Target Deli Section. This is the best place to go to lunch.

Monday, August 4, 2008

Karma

This is the week my future depends on and suddenly i started thinking about karma. will God decide this weekend to punish me for every little bad thing i have done...i mean no i havent murdered anyone or stolen anything but...i've never been punished for all the times i've had lil white lies or been rude or for the time i forgot to respect my elders... is God gonna combine all this and on Aug 8th decide to get to my judgement day and punish me for everything by making everything go wrong?? i dont know but im scared. i've tried to be nice to everyone this week, although i know 22 yrs can't be made up by just one week... but im trying everything i can. i feel like i'm on some attitude diet. most people try to lose a couple pounds here and there when something huge is going on. or groom and wax and buy new clothes. me? i go on an attitude diet. i hope everyone sees a different person after ust a few days on my new diet.

Saturday, August 2, 2008

American Boy

Agenda:
  1. bacon alarm clock
  2. music videos
  3. my boy
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Isn't the best smell in the world breakfast? regardless of what type of food you are used to, breakfast foods give everyone such a huge craving. at my office if anyone ever toasts bread in the toaster, the whole staff is in the lunchroom scrummaging for food. its amazing how our body reacts to our comfort food, for example, this convenient breakfast smell alarm clock.
I love how it is shaped like a pig, CUTE. the clock starts cooking the bacon 10 mins before ur wake up time and when it slowly cooks you are slowly aroused. perfect! reminds me of Saturday mornings when my parents woke up and made huge breakfasts.



I heard a newer song the other day by Estelle and Kanye called American Boy. I loved it. it is so catchy and the black and whiteness of the video is so classic.

This girl reminds me of the Indian MIA.... listen to her song "Paper Planes" here. They both have similar sound qualities...but estelle is the more classy version. I feel both of their songs have a few notes that are off... but that makes it really pretty and unique!

Speaking of American Boys... i always thought my future would consist of a typical malu ABCD. yea the ones that go all week in gangsta clothes thinking they are hardcore and then come to church on sundays as altar boys and sunday school teachers. that is definitely not what i got. the one i got is sort of a figment of my imagination, a made up character put together from hours of talking. but this week he is going to become real again. although i've known him for so long, im still not sure what kind of person he really is, how he behaves with his environment. my relationship is based on a lot of "when we are together" "later on in life" and futuristic goals...but this next weekend it will be real again. just like everyone elses'.